Many times, we get caught up in our own thoughts of who people are, what they are capable of, and how they fit into our lives. When those dreams get shattered, we sometimes stay connected to the fantasy of the relationship. We think about the possibilities of what could have been. We project our ideas of what we wanted on them, even if they can't ever satisfy that dream. We fall in love with their potential, thinking (and saying) things like, "If they only would do [insert action/thing here], then it would all work out for us." Unfortunately, if they were capable of meeting those actions or standards, maybe you wouldn't have broken up.